Recently, I had a two-year anniversary.
But this wasn’t the usual kind of anniversary. It wasn’t an engagement or graduation or wedding.
This anniversary commemorated checking myself in to a psychiatric hospital. As you’ll see below, that moment was the catalyst for my starting A BEAUTIFUL MESS, a mental health organization that runs Corporate talks and events to combat loneliness, depression and stigma.
I remember vividly the thoughts running through my head when I was checking in (and throughout). No one would ever want to date me again. Or love me. Or marry me, let alone have children with me…
Some ideas stay with you forever. Even if you forget them briefly, they never fully leave you but rather get more impactful each time you rediscover them.
I return to the axioms below again and again because of how much perspective I continue to gain from them. They describe the 2 principles you must hold in mind simultaneously if you want to achieve anything:
1) You are a god. AND
2) You are nothing.
I used to think I was an introvert because I got drained by socializing. I learned it wasn’t the socializing that was the problem, it was the KIND of socializing that got to me.
I hate small talk. So much so that I founded a workshop called SMALL TALK SUCKS. It’s one in a series of events we put on at A BEAUTIFUL MESS, which runs corporate events and talks to increase intimacy, make meaningful connections, and fight mental health stigma.
Here’s what I mean by that.
As a culture we are horrified by rape.
Unless the rapist is white.
Unless the rapist is an athlete.
Unless the rapist is rich.
Unless the rapist is powerful.
Unless the rapist is a really great businessman.
Unless the rapist looks like the “guy next door”.
Unless the rapist has an amazing “pedigree”
Unless the rapist has always been “super nice to us”.
Unless the rapist is “a really nice guy”.
Unless the rapist is a great football player.
And the list goes on.
Here’s what the result is…
On Effort: A Love Letter To The People Who Make Me Feel Loved.
Everyone wants to be included.
Everyone wants to feel loved and appreciated and seen and valued and honored and treasured.
Categorical statements are rarely true (and usually annoying as f*ck to boot), but I believe those are few that are VERY true (and not annoying as f*ck).
The converse is usually also true. It SUCKS to be excluded. To not feel cared for, loved and honored — it can be brutal.
Statements about “everyone” or us as a collective whole are a lot easier and a lot…
Sasha is the Founder of A BEAUTIFUL MESS (ABM), a mental health organization that runs corporate talks and events to combat loneliness, depression & stigma.